Hey peeps and peepettes

As the classic 2000 rock band Stain’d once remarked, it’s been a while. You are all due an update.

First things first - soon you shall be getting all your delightful rewards, and we apologise for the delay in getting them to you. We have not been sitting on our laurels, I assure you. We have no laurels to speak of. I am unsure what a laurel is.

The rewards will be sent out in the next few weeks when we get the remaining funds from Creative England and you will get a private link to the film on Saturday 17th October! 

Meanwhile: We have been getting on with the business of post-production, a glorious affair which involves a lot of time spent in front of a computer going slowly, quietly and sexily crazy. Our marvellous editor Isaac, our sound designer Zander and our grading man Chris are doing an excellent job of making Stages look and sound really rather nice. 

We also have some rather exciting news (drumroll please)

Every year, Creative England, BFI and Creative Skillset hold showcases of short films from the iShorts scheme for us to enter. The first one will be Aesthetica in York in November and Stages has been accepted! 


It’s also a BAFTA-qualifying festival! 

I mean - hahahahaha as if lol yeah rite - but a girl can dream can’t she? 

Dream about getting close enough to Stephen Fry to be able to lick his face? Dream about passing Benedict Cumberbatch on the way to a tray of free salmon puffs? Dream about sharing a fruity joke with Hayley Atwell whilst throwing some shapes on the dance floor with Abi Morgan?! Dream about the Nesquick bunny chasing you through a dark forest whilst you're naked and you're late for a maths exam!? Sorry... different kind of dream.

Anyway - we are off to York on the 7th of November to watch the film on a big cinema screen in front of people, and afterwards there is a Q & A. I am hoping we get asked questions like “what's your favourite thing about Cher?” and “why are there no cats in your film?” 

If you’d like to know more about the festival, this is the link.

The next showcase will be at London Short Film Festival in January, which we are also planning to submit to. 

Anyway, to sum up. Thanks again! You shall have your excellent rewards soon! York! Benedict Custardpatch! 

Also here are some on-set snaps taken by our lovely photographer Sue for you to enjoy  xxxxx

One Week To Go!


Greeting Backers!!

Just a quick update to celebrate the final week in pre-production with you all! 

We are very nearly all crewed up for the film, the costumes have been perchased, the props are being created (and believe you me they look delicious) risk assesments are being finished, kit is being ordered and shot lists are being reviewed. 

An email was sent out to backers who had selected to join us on set for the day as an extra! It seems that this invite has reached a few of you but some have not recieved it so if you haven't yet, here it is! Please do let us know as soon as you can if you can join us on set and bring friends!

Ciao for now! See you on the flip side!



Get Some Action! - Beavering Away


Hello backers!

Just a quick update. We are very close to the end of our pre-production with only a few weeks to go so needless to say, we are busy beavering away!

(Beavers, not all that cute! who knew.)

It's time to get yourselves some action! I can confirm that we will be shooting in the Bristol Bierkeller on Saturday the 11th of July. If your reward included the chance to join us on set as an extra, you will receive your invite with times and other details in the next couple of days.  

Other rewards should be heading your way towards the end of July. We'll let you know when they are in the post!

Thanks for now, 

Emma & Ellen


Tar Very Much!


A massive thank you from Stages HQ!

As Ellen mentioned in the last update, we have genuinely been touched by the response and support we have received from you guys and we can't wait to get into action and shoot!!

There is a lot still left to do before we get too trigger happy and we are currently wading through our pre-production on the project. We plan to shoot in July, (those of you planning to join us on set will get an email confirmation of the date and time shortly) and hope to be sending out the various other rewards soon after. The film will be completed by the beginning of September and shall make its merry way around the festival circuit so we'll keep you updated with how it's doing and where you can see it.

Thanks again for all your marvellous generosity, please feel free to keep in touch and if you'd still like to get involved with the project in other ways, hit us up on Facebook, Twitter, or email us;

Big, itchy, love from us here at Stages x



Ferrets, itchy bits and cake!


A massive joyous thank you to all the backers who have pledged so far. Myself and Emma could no do this without you, and you're generous investment in our little movie. You are beautiful. Now have some of this cake. You deserve it. You are fabulous. It's got buttercream in the middle.

Five days to go!

We have FIVE days to go until the crowdfunder ends and things are really heating up here at Stages HQ! Myself and Emma have especially set up a room filled with glitter, balloons, puppies and fireworks which are all timed to go off as soon as the crowdfunder ends on Monday! its going to be dangerously fun!

With so little time left, we still need your help to meet our target so please share our page on the social medias, tell your friends, enemies and casual aquaintances about our short and for the love of God eat some more of the cake, we made too much.

As a EXTRA thank you here are FIVE facts about thrush you may not be aware of...

1.  Did you know that thrush was invented by the Romans in Roman times?

2. Did you know that the Greeks have 657 words for thrush but only one word for that feeling you get when you stand up too quickly?

3. Did you know that the best way to cure thrush is to drink the blood of an arrogant pigeon on a thursday at 6.05pm whilst chanting the words to itchycoo park?

4. Did you know that 1 in every 2 million women will think that they have thrush but will actually turn out to have trapped a small ferret (or several) in their pants?

5. Did you know that thrush is a sign of a life well lived?

N.B - Did you know that thrush is a serious medical condition and if you are showing symptoms, you should consult a medial professional. 

Also here is a picture of some baby thrushes, if you need to see something cute after all the thrush talk. Awwwwww

Once again thank you for all your support, we have shed a few tears over the last 3 weeks over all the pledges and have been humbled by how bloody nice you all are.

lots of hugs

Ellen & Emma

Casting news, thanks yous and hi fiving cats.


Thank you!

Thank you to all the wonderful, sexy, and talented people who have pledged to support Stages so far. You guys are amazing, and it means more then you can possibly imagine. Myself and Emma will endevor to produce a film which is witty, warm and reflective of your geneous spirit. A hi five to you all. 

Casting News!

We are pleased to announce that comedian and actor Angus Dunican is going to play Richard, Gwen's well meaning but sometime smarmy other half. He looks like this:

Angus studied Theatre at Goldsmiths, was an Amused Moose Finalist in 2013 (no mean feat, Moose are renowned for their lack of humour) and we think he will bring both gravitas and vulnerability to the role. Plus he was on Robot Wars when he was 14. You can find him on twitter

Locations News!

We have secured the luxuious Bordeaux Quay for our restaurant scenes. It is located by Bristols glorious harbourside, and looks like this:

Pretty sexy right? It's a fabulous space, and serves as a deli, restaurant, brasserie, and cookery school. It has lovely decor and we are excited about getting to hang around in it and soak up it's ambiance.

Still time to pledge!

We have only 15 days left to meet our target, so if you could share the project with your friends, family, work colleagues, acquaintances, accountants, hairdressers and that guy on the bus who always insists on eating a tuna sandwhich, then that would be great.

Everyone knows at least six people who need a short film about a funny lady with an itchy fanny in their life. 

Have a excellent bank holiday, and thanks for reading. 

Ellen and Emma


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