double update - 24 and 25.09.19
Today has been a low day. After the initial high of having Mark back with me, I am now having to face the reality that dad only continues to deteriorate before our eyes. It is made so much harder by having to battle the hospital for every single thing.
Dad was asleep all day. He’d been banging his hand against the bed rails overnight, causing bruises. We asked for an extra pillow for him to make him comfortable (and cushion his hand) and were told no! The last few days he’s been too groggy to swallow properly without help and has been aspirating fluid in to his lungs. The doctors assessed him today and decided he’s no longer safe to eat or drink anything so he will have to continue being tube fed. This is a huge step backwards.
He was also too poorly to have his colonoscopy to check whether he has cancer of the bowel or something else.
Seeing him there so weak, unable to even swallow safely and wasting away before my very eyes breaks my heart. I’m grieving for the man I have lost. This once strong man now no longer knows who I am, perhaps not even who he is any more. It’s really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel right now.
I know that losing a parent is a sad fact of life and many, many people go through the pain of seeing their mum or dad slowly fade away. It’s just incredibly hard dealing with this so far from home. I miss my children and grandchildren (yes I’m a nanna!) so much. And I want Dad to have the care he deserves. If there is any chance for even the smallest improvement in his condition, it’s not going to happen whilst he is here.
But even though it feels the hardest thing I’ve ever had to cope with, I am not going to give up on him. I will keep fighting for him to come home, keep fighting for adequate care and treatment, keep being his voice while he has no voice.
Thank you for everything you are doing – please keep sharing our story. And for those of you who have felt able to donate thank you. I know that some of you who have given don’t have much yourselves – there’s just not enough words in the world to express my gratitude to you.
Praying for a miracle.
Dad continues to get worse. Today it was confirmed that he has hospital acquired pneumonia. The nurses have finally padded Dad out with pillows and turned him on his side. This is a first, despite being here for weeks now! They have said they will turn him again later. Better late than never.
Sadly, with one small victory comes another battle. Unfortunately, they have now told us that only one person can be with him during certain hours and they sent Mark out at 10am. Apparently this has always been the rules and they had been overlooking them ‘until now.’ Just when I’ve got Mark back and am not on my own any more…
We still need a minimum of £8k to get him home. We are keeping everything crossed for a possible local news article back in the UK which we hope will bring some more help. Please pray that people see our story, feel moved and donate. We would have Dad home in a heartbeat if only we had the funds.
Thank you to everyone who has donated in the last few days. You are wonderful and we couldn’t possibly do this without all of you.
Love Tamsyn xxx
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