After 6 years living in Northern Ireland, I finally reunited with my teenage kids back in 2023!
When I officially moved here in 2017 with my Irish baby and a relationship with her dad, the plan was to bring the kids along once my visa got sorted.
I spent those 6 years fighting to be allowed to stay.
My first application for a Visa as a parent got denied under the explanation that the Irish child has an Irish dad and therefore wouldn't need the care of her mother to stay in this country.
The second attempt, we tried making a stronger application with her father stating he had no interest in separating me from Ella and with several letters written by friends, school and doctors stating the child was always under my care and how they all recognised me as the main, sole carer of the child.
Denied again. Same explanation but with a "The father's wishes don't matter if we decided so" note to it.
On every attempt any fees paid were just lost.
Right then, Brexit happened and my solicitor found a new possible way and visa that became available for the families of european (irish) citizens living inthe UK (Northern Ireland).
This was a long shot, but it was also free of home office fees, and pretty much our only chance.
First attempt,denied. The home office understood that although I was (am) the sole carer of an irish child, that isn't enough of a lifetime bond with the european citizen, so we had to go and appeal that decision in court.
This is when things got really expensive, really quickly... because you can't get help with the fees for this kind of case.
After a long fight and a lot of invoices, finally in 2022 I got my visa, a pre settled status valid for 5 years.
I was finally ready to organise myself to go get the (now) teens. I started a business, got a new relationship and everything seemed to be just right again.
its now 2024 and I find out that visa I got doesn't extend to my teens, but also, with the new relationship my own visa needs changed.
Now the Brexit visa isn't a possibility and we all gotta apply for family visas.
With that comes absolutely heartbreaking fees to the home office, to the NHS and to my legal team who will likely have a fight ahead as the home office prefers those visa applications to be done from outside of the UK.
After seeking advice from my solicitor, I have been informed each person would cost close to £4k. Bringing the total I'd have to gather to be able to start the applications to around £12k.
Mostly to be paid upfront.
My heart has never shattered this hard. Never have I felt so powerless as a mother and so small as a human being.
To top it all this has to be done ASAP as John is now 17 and at 18 won't be considered a dependant of mine.
Northern Ireland has been my home for over 7 years now. I have my little business going, I pay taxes, my kids all go to schooI and are quite brilliant. This is the only life Ella knows, and the only home I'd chose to raise and keep my children. All of my children. Together.
I'm hoping in my time here I have created enough connections, touched enough people and maybe offered a smile and a bit of kindness to some, to find the help we so desperately need.
Please help if you can. Share, donate and help us stay all safe together.
Much love, humbly,
Gabi.