!! FOR SALE: BUY THE DUKE’S LAND !!*
*satire
For a limited time only YOU could become the proud owner of 3m x 3m of the Duke of Westminster’s land!*
Owning more than 130,000 acres of land in England (the equivalent of 98 thousand football pitches), The Duke is in over his head.
The land under his control is bare, lifeless and walled off and, even worse, he’s actively setting thousands of acres on fire so he can shoot birds for fun.
This has to stop.
We’re staging an intervention.
The Duke is taking the law into his own hands, so we’re taking his lawn into ours.
LEND A HAND, BUY THE DUKE’S LAND TODAY!
- Make a £5 - £30 contribution and receive the digital deed to your 3m² empire
- Choose the £30 and over option, and you'll get a paper copy of your deed plus a limited edition pin and your own rewilding seed packet making their way to your doorstep
- The Duke is kindly holding an open day on Sunday 25th August so we can start the rewilding operation!! Bring your seeds and a sandwich, see you there!
!! FIRE SALE !! EVERYTHING MUST GO!!
Known to his close friends as m’Lord, the Duke is worth £10 billion and is the third richest person in the country.
His Lancashire estate is closed to the peasan-sorry... 'public', and is used for hunting. The 23,000 acres of once flourishing moorland should be home to some of the UK’s world-renowned peatland - our country’s biggest natural carbon store, vital to fighting planetary collapse.
Unbelievably, the vast swathes of precious moorland owned by the Duke is set on fire every year… in order to create a better playing field to shoot birds.
As any 5 year old will tell you: if you keep deliberately breaking something, you’re probably not going to be allowed to keep it.
!! BURNED AND UNEARNED !! RETURN COMMON LAND TO THE COMMONS TODAY!!
Whether you choose to grow veg, plant trees or let the land come back to its wild natural state we know that you - the Great British Public - will make far better use of this precious land than the Duke.
In this time of climate breakdown, wildlife extinction, food insecurity and astronomical rent - what better time to invest in some of the Duke’s prime real estate!!
When billionaires and aristocrats damage and destroy land to this degree, they simply don’t deserve to keep it. Communities should have a right to buy mismanaged land and use it for common good.
Make a financial contribution today to send a message to all Britain’s richest landowners, and secure your place in history (plus, FINALLY get on the property ladder).
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JUST HOW AWFUL IS GROUSE MOOR BURNING? VERY, VERY AWFUL
- Huge areas of moorland, mostly in the north of England and Scotland, are kept private from public access for hunting. Every year they set the heather on fire to encourage new growth. Grouse birds like to eat young heather plants, so more young heather means more grouse to shoot for fun
- According to Greenpeace: “Often seen as our equivalent of rainforests, peatlands are the UK’s biggest carbon sinks – storing around 3.2 billion tonnes of carbon. Peatland is also an excellent natural buffer against flooding due to its ability to soak up water when it is in good condition. This helps slow the flow of water through the uplands and reduces the risk of flooding downstream. More frequent extreme weather due to the climate crisis will make natural defences like this ever more important.”
- The UK has 13% of the world’s blanket bog, which in a healthy state is an important store of carbon and natural habitat for wildlife but produces massive carbon dioxide emissions when burned
- The industry is almost entirely unregulated. A limited ban with plenty of loopholes was introduced in 2021, supposedly preventing burning of ‘deep’ peat. Many scientists agree a ban on burning of any depth is required to halt climate change
- More than 1,500 individual reports of illegal burning have been made by the public to the government since the ban on deep-peat burning was introduced in 2021. How many have resulted in even so much as a warning? One.
*all funds raised will go towards rewilding projects. This auction is satire