From an early age I remember going to the post office with my mom to collect the family allowance - from my recollection it was £29 a week, this covered the weekly food shop and the electric meter. Looking back now I don’t know how she managed it, but she did - we never went without food. My mom’s amazing x
I was probably the youngest, and then the oldest paper round girl in my neighbourhood. I couldn’t believe it when my mom allowed me to have a paper round, I was 10 years old. This couldn’t happen today - there’s no way I’d let my little one out and about at that age!
I would earn £5 a week and with this I would buy sweets to eat on my round and sometimes I would buy myself some trainers / shoes. My mom would let me order them from the catalog and then I would pay for them weekly. I loved earning my own money.
I’m not academic and as a child I didn't have a raw talent/skill. I had to work hard and somehow managed to get through my GCSE’s. No one in my family had been to college or University but I wanted more for myself and eventually my family. My family weren’t able to support me financially so as soon as I left school I found a job working in a factory - I did this along side college and eventually I went on to University and worked 3 jobs.
Loving Life ✅
My 20s going into my 30s were great. My hard work had paid off.
I met my partner and we had a fabulous time. After many years we decided to start a family. The process of getting pregnant was a difficult one but we got there x
One day cock of the walk - Next, a feather duster...
I’m homeless with a child.
My salary isn’t enough to pass a private rental check.
The council can’t assist.
Cafcass wrote their report, safeguarding issues were raised (against my partner) and court proceedings started.
I was engulfed with anxiety, stress and fear. I needed legal help and fast. I can’t begin to tell you the fear I felt. I soon came to realise that legal aid didn’t exist for family court matters.
No home. No money. I worked full time and needed full time childcare, even with the help I had, this drained my finances - I think anyone with children will understand this.
6 weeks before court I was lucky that a family friend let me have a room in their home, all I had to do was to find £1200 for solicitor fee's.
This is where my real troubles began.
- Loan sharks
- Log book loans
- Payday Loans
I couldn’t get a bank loan and I knew I was getting myself into a lot of debt but I did what I thought was the best thing at the time. I was naive to think that as soon as court proceedings were over I could concentrate on paying everything back...
My first time in court was so intimidating, I didn’t know what to expect. I could see ex-partner wasn’t there "court adjourned" my solicitor said. I wanted to cry and I did a lot. This meant I was living this horror all over again and the cost...it was so overwhelming. Many months passed and I attended court several times...Guess where the money came from?
Hindsight is a great thing, there are so many things I would have done differently, but the fear was very real. I was so anxious and the thought of my child being in danger was too much.
In my last court appearance I did represent myself and I am happy to tell you that I have full parental responsibility - but this came with massive debts.
The irony of all this - A few mistakes have meant that I am now in a worse of a situation than that of my mother 30 yrs ago, struggling week to week. I honestly didn't ever think I would be in this situation.
I have overcome homelessness, abuse but the one thing I find so difficult to shake-off is the overwhelming crippling reality of debt.
I check my bank each day and before I go food shopping - I make a list of exactly what I need before I shop and I calculate my spend whilst walking around the store - the anxiety of putting my shop through the checkout hoping that I’ve added everything up correctly and the right price tag was attached, it’s so stressful - I don’t want to hear DECLINED!
I have a lot to be thankful for - I have a happy child - that has no idea what’s happening around us. We have our health, a roof over our heads and my daughter has never missed a meal.
The one wish I have is that I should have taken my 20's-30's with more seriousness - saved money at every opportunity. I feel disappointed in myself. I have not been out of work since the age of 10 yet I have nothing to show for this.
I am so embarrassed about this and in no way do I think that the debt I am in is anyone else’s fault but mine. Yes - the interest rates were ridiculous but I knew this and still had the loans.
I’ve wrote and deleted this so many times - We’re heading into a New Year so with my positive vibes I thought - Do It!
I’m sending this plea out to those that are financially secure and to those may be able to relate to what I’ve been through. It always astounds me how generous people are ❤️
I am worried about my financial position - more so now because of Covid. What will happen to us if I lose my job - like the thousands of people that already have - what if I become ill?
If you would like to donate to my fund to help me out of this situation I will be eternally grateful. I promise you - I am a good egg x
Here is a list of all my monthly debts which have spiralled out of control.
Even the smallest donation would be amazing.
The amount owed changes monthly as I pay my debts every month. Even if I could raise enough money to pay off a few of the smaller loans, this would be AMAZING xxx
What I would really love is if there was someone out there that was secure enough financially to consolidate my loans - I would pay you EVERYTHING back. I am paying over £800 a month on these debts, I could come to a monthly arrangement with you.
My plan is to pay off this debt (however long it takes) then to enrol on to another training course - this will help with my career development.
Thanks again for reading x
V68 Monthly £47.04 / Outstanding x7
V44 Monthly £45.30 / Outstanding x9
V06 Monthly £46.30 / Outstanding x9
V71 Monthly £59.25 / Outstanding x13
V82 Monthly £42.82 / Outstanding x14
C&C Monthly £131 / Outstanding x41 £5371 inc interest
118 Monthly £186 / Outstanding £4092 inc interest
EDL Monthly £203 / Outstanding £2897 not inc interest
PDL Monthly 125 / Outstanding £875