I've lived with anxiety most of my life. I have medical trauma and related cPTSD stemming partly from surviving sepsis. Things came to a head recently when I was too distressed in the operating room for the anaesthetist to put me under and my much needed spinal surgery couldn't be performed. Something in me broke that day and I need help to put things back together.
After a recent NHS mental health assessment I was told "you need long term psychotherapy which we can't provide, I don't know why your GP wasted all our time referring you." I work for the NHS as a clinic co-ordinator so this isn't about bashing a service that has been chronically underfunded for decades.
I loathe that I am here asking for help, but if I am to move forwards in life and be able to live a life without fear, panic attacks, flashbacks and intrusive thoughts, I have to seek help. Something has to change.
I have found a trauma informed therapist willing to take me on for private zoom sessions, but at £45 a week I cannot, on my NHS wage, afford that. Any and all donations will be used to fund my therapy and if by some miracle I end up with more than I need, any additional funds would be donated to MIND to benefit others with mental ill health.
I would be grateful beyond measure for any support you are able to give. Thank you.