C-PTSD Help

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Flexible funding – this project will receive all pledges made by July 3rd 2019 at 9:43pm

Food and housing support for C-PTSD victim and her pet cat.

by Melissa in Eastbourne, England, United Kingdom

Sometimes, a person needs a boost. I am such a person.  I have heard of miracles happening on the internet, so I will raise my hand and ask for one because I am in need.  This is not easy to write. 

You see, I am a 43-year-old woman who has found herself in a very difficult situation. I am recently divorced and suffering from Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD). I have not worked in over two years due to my illness, and I also had to withdraw from my PhD in Applied Linguistics due to the EMDR therapy I underwent. My husband divorced me last August, and I have used all of my divorce settlement to cover my living expenses up until now. I have less than £100 in my bank account. 

While I have received a job offer to resume my teaching career at a prestigious university in London, that work will not commence until August. The problem is that I no longer have any money from which to live. I have applied for state benefits, but this is turning out to be a long process.  I am trying to heal and put past traumas behind me, but the fear that my little kitten and I could possibly be homeless is crippling me. I really want to rejoin society and inspire and lead young people, to begin work on a book to help other girls and women who were victims of childhood sexual abuse and torture, but the struggle to keep my head above water is becoming all-consuming. I fear that I may be sinking. 

There does not seem to be any outreach program in the United Kingdom for women in my situation.  I recently swallowed my pride and called a wealthy man I dated in my youth, the man I always considered to be the love of my life, and asked him for help. His exact words were, “Get a job. You are no better than anyone else.”   

What is a woman to do when she has no family to assist her after she remembers what happened to her and it rips her world apart?  I shudder to think how many other women out there are struggling with this very same issue.  

Ironically, my doctoral research was on the internet romance scam, and I have analysed hundreds of solicitation emails sharing sob stories and asking for help from kind-hearted people. Now, here I am, writing a very small portion of my own sad story. The only differences here are that (1) my English is fluent and (2) my story is real.  

I felt ashamed when I began this text, but that shame is moving towards steely determination. I don’t want the evil which happened in my childhood and teens to be the end of me. I want to pick myself back up and move forward. All I need is a helping hand to get me through the next few months. Therefore, if anyone does read this and happens to have a few pounds to spare, little Freya Kitten and I would be eternally grateful. You would literally save our lives. I have given people money, clothed and fed the homeless, spoken to troubled girls in foster care, and volunteered in underprivileged schools throughout my entire life and have never asked for a thing for myself. I figure it might not be so bad to ask this one time. Maybe this crowdfunding idea is a way for us to help our brothers and sisters in real need. If this works for me, I will begin a non-profit organisation to help women in similar situations.  A former American First Lady was correct when she said it takes a village. 

Thank you for reading my story. 

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